Day 13: Postjana- Literally the biggest cave in the world!

Both of us woke up today not sure what to expect as we were going on a bear hunt into a deep, dark cave. Actually there were no bears involved but there was a cave, and a castle built into a cave and a train.
You see we had pre booked tickets to go to Slovenia’s second largest cave…not quite the largest in the world that I originally thought that it was! We jump in the car and head down the road, as our Tourist Farm is incredibly close. Thank the lord that we booked tickets online as this place is busy and we get to skip the mammoth queue that has already formed by 10am and enter the queueless pre-booked ticket line…see ya later suckers!
We go to the mouth of the cave (ooo technical geography term) and join our English tour buddies which is by far the biggest group. If we spoke Slovenian we would be having a private tour! But we don’t so big group it is! We enter the turnstiles to find the paparazzi awaiting us. Whoever thought it was a good idea to take the souvenir photos as people are going through a turnstile, with no warning needs to be sacked! Thankfully our photos were not available at the end as we took such a long time going through the cave that they had already been disposed of.
Here we decide not to rent a cloak which is risky as the temp is 8 degrees in the cave and I have gotten very used to my daily highs of 34. Then it is time to board the train- our 4th of the holiday…we love trains! We take a cheeky train selfie, carefully not smashing the camera as the ceilings are low, even for me and we try to capture the cave as it is whizzing past us but are hugely unsuccessful!

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Now I have been in my rightful share of caves in my life but this is nothing like I have ever seen before. It is quite frankly bloody huge! When our tour guide told us that each stalagmite (ones that grow on floor) and stalactites (ones that dangle from the ceiling)…how GIA of me, are you impressed Lianne? Well anyway as she told us that each one of the mites and tites take 100 years to grow just 1 millimetre we start to lose our minds. What is time? We are so insignificant. Might as well just live in this cave for ever and never reemerge. Dinosaurs. Sea Monkeys. Issac Newton. The Big Bang.

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We wind and weave our way around the cave and quickly realise that right at the back is the place to hang out. So much so that we quickly lose our group and are just wandering around this bad boy solo so I sadly have no more geographical facts for you but I do have cute pictures of me pretending to be a bear!

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Bobo also loves the cave. She does not love when the electricity in the cave faults for a few moments and we are left in the darkness. I love it and feel sad when people get out their iPhone torches. Just let a girl feel like a bat for a second please! There isn’t actually much more to say about the inners of the cave…ooo cave inners…apart from it is beautiful, there are weird human fish who live here too and you should def detour your Pre-Brexit tour for a couple of nights to visit here too. We also both hit up the souvenir shop and buy matching souvies that have absolutely nothing to do with the cave as we are cute like that!

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#cockrock

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We get back on the train, after photobombing a fair few photos and get back into the real non cave world again. We grab some alright vegetable soup and race over to the shuttle bus that is taking us to Postjana castle which is a castle that is built into a cave and the views of it are so beautiful! We grab ice creams and devour them on deckchairs and we take it all in.

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The castle on the outside looks not all that big but once we are in it we realise that it is actually huge and goes all the way to the top of the mountain! We learn about the families who used to live here, secret tunnels, how to poor hot oil onto people you don’t want in your crib and I try on a helmet made of metal…I think that this may have a fancier name. We both realise that even though medieval people were super short they have massive stairs as we climb every single one of them all the way to the top, risking our lives, some of this definitely would not be allowed in the UK but I kinda love that! In the souvie shop I consider buying a mace, not the spray but a real one, it is only our flight home that stops me. Can’t a girl get a break and just by medieval weapons on a whim anymore?

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We go back to our fave cafe spot as we have some time to chill in before the shuttle bus arrives to take us back to our car. We board the bus and Bobo checks to see if she has all of her belongings. She can’t find her phone, but it will be alright as it will be in there somewhere. Except that it isn’t. It isn’t in there anywhere and this bus leaves in 3 minutes. She races to the cafe to see if she left her there whilst I get ready for my greatest performance to date- that of delaying this bus as I am not waiting another hour for the next one. As the lady is about to send the bus on its way I quickly pop out of my seat and stand between the two doors so they can’t shut and tell her the situation and she tells me that Bowen has 1 minute to get back whist she sends the second bus back to the cave. I frantically ring Bowen, hoping she has found the phone, refusing to leave the bus door, and she picks up saying she has found it and is on her way back. I explain this to the lady who still wants to send the bus on its way without the Bo and I am one step away from the greatest asthma attack of my life as we see little Bobo running around the corner. I sit down calmly and we get on our way. A massive shout out to the person who handed in the phone. You are a player and a true BoBlunt club member. Come hang with us anytime!

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Cave and castle in a cave done we head back to the farm for a little bit, we hang with the goats, and chill for an hour or two. It is lovely but hunger gets the best of us and we drive to a pizzeria where the polenta steals the show! Post polenta we climb back into bed of what has been a surprising long day. We play a few games of cards and then decide to back up our own game: I can’t Donald Trump it…coming to stores near you soon. It is actually an amazing game and I won every time. That isn’t true. Bowen did.

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So this is our last full day in gorgeous Slovenia done. Tomorrow we head back to Croatia for a trip down the coast but don’t worry rain is forecast… As I am writing this Bowen is trying to get me to detour our trip to Pula by visiting a tractor museum. I do the driving. I will not be stopping there!
Sloevnia has been a gem of a place, so mountainous (who knew they had mountains) gorgeously kind people and we are only leaving amazing memories behind. Cheers Slovenia. You have been Slovelynia!

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