DAY 3: Drag Queens, Ramen and Balloon Dogs

After falling asleep at 9.30pm last night it was no surprise that we were up at 5.30am! We plotted and planned our attack for the day and quickly realised, after watching the women who look like the are dressed for da club on Good Morning LA, that we are in a heatwave. Temperatures are at 35 degrees and there is not a single cloud in the sky. Perfect for being outside all day. We ignored their advice of heading to the beach and decided to do walk the Walk of Fame in the hope of finding Leonardo Di Caprio and Brad Pitt.

At the start of our walk we found a cold pressed juice bar. I went green, Emma went citrus and we both met the loveliest guy who spent 15 minutes giving us tips and advice on good old LA. I don’t know your name but I will call you Fred. Thank you Fred!

So juices in hand we strolled up those famous stars. There was an overwhelming amount of people that we had never heard of at all! WHO EVEN ARE YOU? We found some of our favourites though: Good old Harry Potter, Joan Collins and our Austria babe Julie Andrews….we found you JuJu. We also stumbled upon Donald Trump, unfortunately minutes before the artist built a wall around his star. LOL.

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We made our way to The Chinese Theatre to see whose hands and tootsies were the same size as ours and were still on the search for Leo and Brad and were horrified to discover that they don’t have stars. Don’t worry boys we got you, we are going to camp outside City Hall until you get them.

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Bowen needed some shoes so we headed into the Dolby Theatre mall. We didn’t find shoes but we did find Ru Paul…in a sweet shop. This was the warm up for our evening to come and we practised our DQ poses and our fierce bitchy faces. Well done Bowen you make an excellent Drag Queen, I would so come see your show!

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We sashayed away and made our way onto the tube, sorry metro, and sped away to Downtown LA. We, of course, began our hunt for food and came across Grand Central Market and here we found the best food we have eaten in California so far. If you are ever in the area you have to visit Ramen Hood, it is 100% vegan and the flavour was insane. We shared the spicy ramen and avocado toast combo. I think the avocado toast is the best thing that I have ever it into my mouth. I die!

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Post spicy Asian food we headed back out into the heatwave and up a huge bloody hill, ergh, and joined the queue for the Cindy Sherman exhibition at The Broad. The queue was a low point of the day. It was hot, we were sticky but we got free water…every cloud! Also the highlight was tricking Emma that we were starting to be let in, that face! Sorry Bobo!!

We eventually got let in and the feeling of walking into that air conditioning is one that we will remember for ever! The exhibition was fabulous. It really made you think who are we as people if we can change our character so frequently…blah blah blah. The film was outstanding. I like some blood and guts and crazy women. I also love a place that makes you wear your backpack on your front as it really helps you get into the mood of the whole thing and take it really seriously.

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We then headed to the permanent collection upstairs, after a quick coffee break for Bowen as she is an adult and lemonade break for me as I am a small child. We fell in love with the balloon dog and spent a huge amount of time trying to work out how we would make the oversized dining room table work in our love pad.

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Broad completed…next stop. The Los Angeles Mall of dreams via a quick stop at the Cathedral which was odd. It looked part church, part multi-storey carpark. I’m not sure how I feel about modern places of worship, however, the seats are a lot more comfortable. We spent 5 minutes here then headed to get Bobo some shoes from the world famous LA mall…what a bloody dump! I think it is safe to say that we had headed into the badlands of Downtown LA and we genuinely felt scared for our lives. The real gangstas had out gangsted our gangsta. We moved quite quickly on to Little Toyko where we found FroYo, American Apparel, shoes that are too small but we will buy them anyway, and the comfort of a hotel bar.

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Here we enjoyed our first Bud Light…same alcohol content fewer calories…winning at life and made ourselves look a tad more presentable after a day of walking in a Californian heatwave. As we had a very important event to get to back at the Grand Central Market.

Drag Queen Bingo.

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What a night. It was hosted by the fabulous Roxy and I honestly think it will be one of our highlights of the trip. It was just so much fun! The place was packed and everyone was there to have a good time! If you shouted Bingo too early then you were publicly spanked…something that I don’t think happens enough anymore. (Un)fortunately I did not shout Bingo too early and actually bloody won…with a card that Emma swapped with me…sucks to be you BoBo. I had to run around the patio whilst people threw their paper and swore at me. I won $15 dollars to spend in the market, which we spent on water for the next day…fucking rockstars! What a night!

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Well, what a night indeed, as things only got more interesting as we headed down into the depths of the metro to get back to our hotel. With only a few minutes until our metro appeared a delightful man informed me that ‘all the bitches down here are the ugliest that [he] had ever seen’ before throwing a bin onto the tracks which delayed us for half an hour. What a man!

We eventually made it back to the hotel before crashing out, perfectly exhausted from a lovely day, with Magic Mike still playing on the TV, reenergising for a day at Universal Studios.

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